It went well!
I passed the bar exam! I was finally able to breathe a sigh of relief. But it was short-lived because the firm I work for wants me to take a couple of more, which I’ll be doing in February and maaaaybe July. So, you know what they say: Pass a bar exam, but then take two more. Or something like that, I forget. It’s in French and loses something in the translation.
The exam itself was a sucky process. Day 1 was the essay portion which felt (relatively) straightforward. Day 2 was the MBE and that felt messy and terrible and super unfun. I didn’t do as well as I had thought I would on the MBE but the essay portion saved the day. Stuff that’ll get taken into account for the next couple of times (ugh) that I’ll have to take it.
I did want to thank you and the fantastic tumblr people for support and advice. The process sucked but everyone’s support was encouraging and helped me through the tough parts.
I still feel pretentious adding “esq.” to the end of my name. Well, to be honest, pretentious but awesome. And if that’s not the motto of a lawyer, I don’t know what is.
At its purest, Thanksgiving is a day not about overabundance but about being able to sit with those who matter, hold their hands, and to give thanks for having enough. Having had enough to last through another year, having enough to last through the upcoming winter, having enough to survive. It’s about the recognition that but for any number of factors out of one’s own control, things could have turned out much differently and much worse.
And so, in 1621 they gave thanks in Plymouth for having survived a cruel autumn and for having enough to survive a harsh winter; in 1789 George Washington gave humble thanks for tranquility and unity; and in 1863 Abraham Lincoln gave thanks, during a bloody and wrenching civil war, for forgiveness, mercy, and grace.
Thanksgiving has never been about pride, boasting, or ostentation. It has always been, and should always be remembered to be, about respect, humility, and deference. Celebrating not all that we have, but celebrating that we have enough and that we did not get here alone. It’s about celebrating the very fact that we are still here.
This year was a hard one for many of us. As much as I’d like to celebrate my own victories, I can’t help but pause and recognize that during every single one of them—running my own trials, taking & passing the bar, getting a job—I was riddled with doubts and afraid. Yet every single time I had a doubt, I found any number of friends helping me up and pushing me to continue trying. Some were family, some were old friends, and many were recent friends. I have been amazed and overwhelmed by the grace of friendship and faith. Truly, Thanksgiving is about the celebration of the Story of Us, the notion that we, alone, can do so very little during hard times. That it is family, love, faith, and kindness that transforms the defeats into pathways to victory. And the victory is so much sweeter and fulfilling in knowing that we are not alone—that we are connected, that there is a Story of Us.
I am thankful that I have so many people who believe in me and my ability to succeed and become a better person. I am thankful to have people that make me want to do everything I can in order to be a better person.
To those who love me, to those who protect me, to those who care: Truly, honestly, and humbly, I give thanks.
Is sicklied o’er with the pale cast of thought” —
Hamlet (III, i)