The mission has to do with regret… and the mission has to do with mistakes. The mission is also about love. I’m already saying too much.
To go it alone or to go with a partner? When you choose a partner, you have to have compromises and sacrifices, but it’s a price you pay. Do I want to follow my every whim and desire as I make my way through time and space? Absolutely.
But at the end of the day, do I need someone when I’m doubting myself and I’m insecure and my heart fails me? Do I need someone, who when the heat gets hot, has my back?
Many people need desperately to receive this message: "I feel and think much as you do, care about many of the things you care about, although most people do not care about them.
You are not alone.”
Kurt Vonnegut, Timequake
But I believe in her, and I’ve given up on the idea of being right.
I don’t know very much about love. I don’t particularly understand it or see how it functions as an underlying belief system. It’s just so god damn intangible and uncertain. Media—movies in particular—tend to show love as this easy thing with an always-appropriate soundtrack, silly fights, and even sillier problems. All we need is a montage of someone feeling bad and looking off into the sunset and we know that things will be ok.
But real love? Real life? There’s so much uncertainty and misunderstanding. More than any sonnet or Kate Hudson movie, the above quote is probably one of the most real and insightful summations of what love could, or should, be.
Highly recommend watching Birbiglia’s solo show on netflix or checking his even shorter rendition on This American Life (both links below). It’s poignant, it’s applicable, it’s wonderfully told but most of all and most importantly: it’s real.
But I’ll tell you something: I think you’re magicians because you’re unhappy. A magician is strong because he feels pain. He feels the difference between what the world is and what he would make of it. Or what did you think that stuff in your chest was? A magician is strong because he hurts more than others. His wound is his strength.
Most people carry that pain around inside them their whole lives, until they kill the pain by other means, or until it kills them. But you, my friends, you found another way: a way to use the pain. To burn it as fuel, for light and warmth. You have learned to break the world that has tried to break you.